COLORADO SPRINGS — The holidays can be a hard time for many of us, especially those who have experienced loss in the community, as some are also navigating the holidays for the first time after losing a loved one, making this time of year especially difficult.
"We all experience sadness. But during the holidays, there seems to be more of it, more prevalence of that sadness,” says Dr. Cristi Bundukamara, the CEO of Mentally Strong.
According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, a study found mental health symptoms around became worse the holidays.
Cristi Bundukamara is a Navy veteran and a psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner.
She created the program called after experiencing the loss of three children and her husband.
“The biggest difference between Mentally Strong and other clinics is we have walk-in hours every day. Someone can walk in and be seen for a full psychiatric assessment and talk about how to get through whatever is happening in their life right now,” she said.
Between Christmas and the new year, being around family during the holiday season… the loss of a loved one can be felt even more.
“If you have had a loss in the last six months and this is your first holiday without your loved one, you are just trying to survive, and that's okay, right? Lower the expectations to do it right. Lower your expectations that you know you're going to be okay.”
She says it’s okay for you to feel all the emotions during this time of year, even the ones that are difficult.
“After losing my daughter Maya and right before Christmas in 2021, it was my first Christmas, and I brought out the Christmas tree. I realized I had all of these special ornaments that meant something. And instead of just getting angry or pushing it down and pretending like it's nothing, I just allowed myself to cry, like allowing myself to feel that pain, that they're no longer here.”
Other ways to deal with losing a loved one during the holidays include:
- Share stories of the loved one around the table or during a gathering
- Light a candle for the loved one
- Create a memory book or box
- Keep a tradition or aspect of the holiday they enjoyed or that meant a lot to them in their honor.
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